"Before we go any farther on the way I have to warn everyone that I have a terrible, terrible, terrible problem with my language, it just fuckin slips out sometimes, so don't be offended. Don't be offended because I can't stop it......We do fuckin appreciate Australia very much....so uh, shit...don't make me get misty."
"Smoke up kids!"
"I've come to the conclusion that there are two types of people in life: Those who have been to Graceland - and those who have not. I am thankful to say that I am one of those people who has!"
"This next song is about...well, it's about fucking up. It's not about you, no, it's not about me. I am a stable motherfucker!"
"What the fuck is that? Lady, don't throw your fucking gum on stage! That's nasty shit!"
"You can't say you're going to be a rockstar, its unrealistic.....its like saying you're going to be a princess...or a billy goat...or....a firetruck.......but you can say you're going to be a musician...it's just realistic."
"Hey buddy...this is my show ok. .nobody fights at my fucking show...you have 22 hours this day to fight now is not the time."
"What the fuck is this??? I can't sing with this fucking thing in my face." (about the spotlights)
"I have enough to keep me humble and laughing at my own situation, I look at it like a satire. There's humor in this business, you just have to find it." (on his music career)
"We're just normal guys playing music."
"Music saved me long before matchbox20, it was the thing that made Rob, Rob: a defining quality that said maybe I wasn't such a fuck up after all." (on his talent)
"During a two day span other kids would have woken up, gone to school, played football, woken up, gone to school, and played football, in the same two days I would have met a girl at Burger King, spent the day with her, and slept on the beach. When your 17 it's a vagabond dream." (US Magazine April 1998)
"Those fucking lasers scare the shit out of me."
"Being southern boys ourselves, we are used to this heat down here, but we still don't fucking like it!" (July 30, 1998 in Birmingham, Alabama)
"This is for all the sexy people in NY, you know who you are." (before he sang 'damn' at Jones Beach, Long Island NY 8-8-98 - I WAS THERE!)
"All you damn Canadians do is smoke and drink...what a great country!"
"That's what it's all about. Just getting away from all the ordinary shit and listening to some live music."
"Come on people, you paid $25 for a ticket to watch this show. So stop throwing loose change on the stage. We don't need the money."
"If I had to have a controversy, I want to hear that it's that I fucked Courtney Love in a bathroom in a Texaco in Alabama, or something like that. Something that sounds like fun. The rest of it is no good." (article from March/April Music Choice)
"I'd like to thank my mother for giving birth to me so I can wear tight pants."
"I'd rather have people know all the lyrics to my songs than know who I am." (1515 interview on MTV)
"There are only two things you need in life, money and condoms."
"Adam's a child molester."
"Kyle's the quiet funny one and Adam's the loud funny one and me and Paul are mean."
"I wouldn't be any more surprised if wings grew from my ass and I flew around the room" - In response to "Were you surprised at the rate of your success?"
"If you're in a band and you use the name of the band in a song, you're just a jerk."
"We're so girlie. It's just pitiful. I mean, come and talk to us on the bus when we're painting our nails and ask if we're going to beat women." Rob in response to the criticism of "Push."
"This ain't no fucking Metallica concert. If we see anyone over the age of 70 crowd surfing, we're going home."
"My girlfriend's here right now, ask her. She can kick my ass." Rob in response to the criticism of "Push."
"Our whole next record is going to be mad phat rhymes kickin hip hop grooves. It'll be the exactly the same record, we're just gonna rap it." Rob at the 1998 MTV Video Music Awards.
"These are all the, all the ingredients. This is everything you need for a good rock show. And you got, you got lights, you got people. And you got rock and roll, and then you break it down. Then you walk out. You say something cool, what do you say? Uh, everybody, throw the goat! Give me the goat! Give me the goat! Yeah, there you go, that's worth it! That was, that was worth the whole price of admission right there, baby, throwing the goat.!" Rob from live at the 10 Spot.
"God, I was a fat bastard for a while, I'll give them that."
"It was really bad because it was a smokin flight and I smoke like a chimney, man, and I never wanted to get away from smoke so bad in all my entire life, 14 hours in this tiny little room with it. There was some little asshole next to me and I was just gonna choke him cuz we flew to Tokyo before we flew here cuz thats like where we went first and this little Japanese guy just smokin away and I was smoking too but for some reason I felt that his smoke was worse than mine, and I almost choked the little bastard."
"Even if it all falls apart and nobody cares who we are tomorrow, we had this time, you know, and it's a time that a lot of people never get to have. So we're just, you know, really just enjoying it now."
"You meet a lot of guys, like I met this guy who wanted me to pose naked for a men's magazine, and some other guy who pulls over, and I'm like the farthest, farthest, farthest thing from homophobic, I mean I'm borderline bitch. But I get in the car, close the door, put my bag behind the seat , it's a truck, we pull off, I look in the back and see some golf clubs, and I say 'Do you play golf?' He looks over, he's like 65, and he goes 'Listen son,' exact words I'll never forget them, 'I'm a gay person. Do you mind if we pull over here and I suck ya?' I was like 'Aaaa......... no!' 'So you don't mind?' he says, I was like 'Aaaa....... no!! I just appreciate the ride!', and he was like 'Well how about if I just touch ya!?' and he reaches over and starts grabbin for my package, and we were doing like 70 and I grab the gear shift, the truck starts rattlin, stops, and I get out. I'm, like, kicking the truck, I was, like, 17 or 18. It was fucked up!!!.......my personal moral is: be wary of dudes in trucks carrying golf clubs."
"If you're gonna drink, drink responsibly...a lot."
"If I can get eight million fans to like my record, I will shoot 30 critics and not think twice."
"All we ask is that we be called four-hit wonders. That's not too much to ask for, is it?"
"You know what bigger feet means...bigger shoes!"
"I couldn't be happier. It's like you never want to say anything because you don't want to pat yourself on the back. But as far as songwriting, it's some of the best stuff I've ever written. Lyrically and musically, I took everything up a notch just because I didn't want to fall into the same cliches that I used to as a writer or a lyricist. I didn't hit all the exact same themes over and over." (on Mad Season)
"If you have sex in Denver, you can join the mile high club."
"You're not doing it because you wanna sell a million records. You're not doing it because you want anything at all. You're doing it cuz you love to make music. And if it happens, it happens."
"I just wanna be seen!"
"I'm a loser, but you can lie to me."
"A lot of cool things have happened, Letterman was cool...probably the Rolling Stones though...because they're the Stones! They'll always be the Stones!"
"The United Parcel Service - I'd be working for them." (if he wasn't in a band)
"I went to the Atlanta Studio of Music, which is like a 1 year school which is based experience, not really, uh.. scholastic type of stuff so I like it. I always make fun of it when I talk about that school, so I'm just not gonna talk about it!"
"Critics don't like us because there's nothing for them to latch onto and write about. No one in the band is dying from a heroin addiction. We're just out there playing."
"I was in a weird stage at the time, and I heard the demo and thought Rob had an incredibly original voice. His lyrics were heartfelt and the music was really good. I thought the band was really tight and the producer seemed like he had a really good head on him. But it was the song '3 AM,' which is the only song from the demo that made it on the record. That made me think, 'Man, I could hear this on Top 40 radio.' And that was that." (from Guitar Shop)
"Don't just hear it, feel it."
"Yoooo...have you seen my dealer? He's about this tall, aite lookin'..."
"What does it take to be a superhero??"-Ch. 13 anchorperson before the Deer Creek show. "What does it take to be a superhero? . . . I really don't know. I'm just out there playing my music and enjoying the songs."
"That reminds me, I need to get a manicure."
He asked me what my name was, and I told him "Pina" , his response was "Were your parents on acid when they named you?"
"You know, it's funny. I've always been made aware of how brilliant the title is every time I'm walking around a mall or something, where like every door has a little "push" sign on it." - Kyle talking about the title of "Push."
"These pants don't even have pockets!" Kyle's response to a fan's sign (Kyle I'd Put My Hands Down In Your Pocket Anyday) at live at the 10 spot.
"Music and lyrics and songs can be a story, they can be a fantasy. They can come from a place that doesn't exist."
"All is well. We lost our Grammy to our friend Jakob Dylan. We are really happy for him. He's a good man. Deserved it, and hell, the Spice Girls didn't get it. I mean not THIS time anyway." (Postcards From The Road)
"Fans have to respond to the music once it's on the radio, but if it's not on the radio, you're not going to get it heard."
"You know how we're going to combat this 'faceless band' theory? By making every single person in the United States love us!"
"Never lick a phone book."
"We lie. A lot."
"Ahh! I think Silly Pants is a wonderful nickname. I think Fast Britches is a little more disturbing!"
"You know Rob, he's a glue sniffer."
"I can't leave home without my cosmetic bag, that would be my answer because I've got so much shit going on between oxy's and hairsprays and fuck it, I'm the biggest bitch you know!"
"When you're drunk, Don't drive farm equipment."
"I'm a lot older than most kids."
"What it all means is...whether you're playing for fun...or want to be a professional musician....whether you want to be a Doctor or a Car Mechanic....find a way. It's ALL possible. Some people sweat more getting to their stars...others have easier courses....but we ALL are made of the same insides....just try to enjoy the ride there. We are ALL on this planet to enjoy the ride."
"Nothing is easy and everything is not hard."
"It's not about if you can, but how you can."
"I should have been a pope."
"I suggested lots of South American Fighting Standard Poodles to add to our set design."
"The first seven months, I thought Atlantic [Records] was trying to kill us. They sent us through Wisconsin when it was 56 below. All we could see was black ice. There'd be semi-tractor-trailers flipped on their backs like cockroaches. You wake up thinking, 'I'm not going to live another day.' But someone was watching over us."
"I don't think anywhere in the song does it say I want to punch you in the face. If you ever meet us, you will know we are not physically intimidating people." (Adam on the "Push" controversy)
"No, as soon as I got my beauty license revoked, I thought this would be the other occupation."
"We have a great fanbase; it's our critical success that is coming along at a slower rate. But I'm happy as hell. It's about playing hard for your fans, and if you get honored along the way, that's great."
"For all kids out there listening on internet land and wherever you are in the world, we do not condone drinking nor do we recommend it for small children under the age of 21."
"I wanted to build the tallest building in the world. After I was rejected by the circus."
"I'd be a deer tick on your head." (Adam's response to a fan's questions: "What animal would you want to be?")
"George Washington, he was the biggest liar ever. No offense to his family and stuff, but he was a liar."
"Oh, and speaking of my Grandma, did I ever mention to you that she moves with the speed of a young, spry Maine lobster?"
"It was tough. Kyle, our guitar player, had this spider monkey on the bus for three weeks. It turned out to be this experiment of life...throwing bread all over the place. It was just very, very sad."
"I had the strangest dream where a leprechaun stole my Lucky Charms"
"David Hasselhoff? Germans Love him!"
"I gotta figure out what the hell I'm eating."
"I kinda get a rush of fuckin' 10,000 people watching us!"
"Where are we going? To the top! The very top!"
"The record company would kill us for saying this, but we almost want to tell fans when we meet them 'stop buying the record' so we can go in and make the next one."
"Is there a Wendy's near here?"
"Mick won't play golf with me!! he's a singer, I'm just a bass player! Come on, who are we kidding?!"
"HEY! You're all sparkly! How'd that happen? Were you born that way?!"
"Rob's a rockstar, he makes us call him Mr. Thomas!"
"When we go in to make a record it's five of us and Matt [Serletic] and that's the only people that we're gonna listen to. It's our record. It's a matchbox20 record. Not matchbox20 and guests. We're gonna go in there and do what we do - just let us do it."
"Yeah, well actually, since I haven't been home in about a year, my grass is about 70 feet tall!"
"If I don't massage Rob's feet after a show, I'm fired."
"Rob is the king of fucking up. He does it all the time and he is very good at it."
"They can't see me on the radio. I'm 6' 7''. You can tell by my manly voice."
"Stay in school. They gots all the good dope."
"Fires? The name Matchbox 20 comes from the fact that when I was growing up I had a little problem with starting fires. It got to be this big thing where they didn't know who I was, but all these fires were happening."
"Never grow up."
"Kyle likes to beat up lesbians!"
"I had to do an hour long interview with People Magazine on why I thought Rob was so pretty. Even worse off than that, they didn't use a damn word I said!"
"Kyle's whole deal is he loves to play the guitar."
"This is the first time I've worn a skirt. It's pretty comfortable, but as a drummer I couldn't play in it because I can't separate my legs."